she stands twelve feet above the flood

still seeing worlds that never were
and one by one the bright birds leave her…

[The Cure, The Drowning Man]

Night time is the hardest when I’m alone. I’m strong, I know I am – I’ve done my damnedest to keep the grey at bay, to keep my head high as much as possible. However, just as I tell him all the time… he’s the brightest star in my sky, my blanket of calm reassurance, the strong wall I can lean on. All those clichés, but I knew when I first fell in love with him that those clichés were made for him.

Have you ever met someone with whom you just knew to be the one you’d been waiting for? That’s how I was when Rob and I met. Our relationship deepens every day, and I am so very grateful to have found him, grateful for his love.

So you can see why for someone like me, someone who already struggles with depression, being apart can be so difficult. I’ll get through, but this time of night has always been the worst for these feelings.

If only sleep would come…

I write, as openly as possible, about my experiences with life, love, creativity, depression and not-depression. I share opinions. I promote compassion and change. I talk about music. I also write poetry and short stories. I like to share them here.

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