… we need all the hope that we can get.

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Under the veneer of my sometimes cheery, sometimes melancholy image, there lies anger.
I don’t talk about it much. Hell, most of the time, I don’t really feel it – even though I know that it seethes in there, shut behind mental doors of steel-like fortitude. But it IS there, and I need to acknowledge that [...]

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Things I should know by now:
I don’t have a good track record with exercises that require me to do something every day. I was amazed by how well I did with The Artist’s Way Morning Pages, but the 365 Photos project… fail. Big ol’ FAIL. Poop.
More sleep = more energy. Now if you’ve known me [...]

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One thing that the Wellbutrin seems to have done is take away my ability to cry. It’s actually really frustrating, because the FEELING is still there, I just have no mechanism for letting it out. I can even feel the emotional welling that would signal the usual burning feeling I get before the tears flow… [...]

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And she is not good or bad
Oh, but she wants all she could have
Your soul’s familiar call
This is it… I am and
It’s not like me
[Claire Voyant - not like me]
My silence is equal to my lack of passion. I am adrift in a sea of “I don’t care” and “I’m too tired” and [...]

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NOT SAFE FOR WORK. DELIRIOUSLY FUN. HELL YEAH. [okay, I'll stop yelling now]

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Weather: hot. Damn hot for April.
Mood: a bit worn but overall upbeat.
Location: on the deck at Broad River Coffeeshop, under an umbrella.
Music: Morrissey, of course.
So hello there… radio silence broken at Chez Xiane, and no worries – things have been as up and down as anyone can expect in this life, but I’m doing well [...]

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Image by Ehsan Khakbaz via Flickr

We all need the security that belonging brings…*
This weekend, I went back to a place that I wasn’t sure that I’d ever visit again. Not a specific place, exactly – but a kind of conceptual one.
I had a lovely weekend visit from Kristyne and Jay, with our goal [...]

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Nick Drake always seemed to get the words/sounds right for these feelings. This video was, ironically, a tribute to Nick Drake that Heath Ledger put together.
When does the past stop having a hold over us? When do we get to put the monsters to rest? I have two; one is dead, and the other [...]

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No music quote to start this off! How odd! However, I can share that my latent DJ brain has been working overtime, throwing together in the Big Mix In My Head a mashup between:
The Who [my generation]
Jet [are you gonna be my girl]
Iggy Pop [lust for life]
I haven’t actually tried any of these out together, [...]

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